Sweet Charity

I'd like to thank all
of you retards who
actually wasted your money
on my book instead of
donating it to charity
or putting it toward
your child's education.
I hope it pissed you off and
that it will continue to piss you
off for a long, long time.

P.S. I used the money to get hookers
and drugs.

Sober and Back

Hello,
stupid, pathetic fools.
You probably thought I was dead
and you rejoiced and sang songs.

Well I wasn't dead,
just drunk.

Now I'm sober and back.
With more terrible poems to ruin your
miserable lives.

Fools.