This poem
is a magical pill
you read about in a spam advertisement.
It
will give you a huge, rock hard boner (and shiny)
that you can use for hours and hours.
Like if you have to clean the shower drain,
or perhaps you have a hole in a tree in the backyard
that needs scraped out, or maybe the downspouts on
your gutters get clogged. Thanks to this poem,
your huge, rock hard boner (and it's shiny, too, and has a purple tint)
will help you.
Maybe you can't use your hands to change the channel,
just poke those channel up and down buttons with
your dong.
Or mayhap you can't flip that omelette you've been working on.
Just slide your wang in and give it a toss. Don't
fuck around any more. With this poem, your lollygagger
will be rock hard, huge, and it will make you feel invincible,
(and don't forget: 1) shiny, 2) purple, 3) veins popping out all
over the place.)
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About Me
- Hilton Hightower
- Hilton Hightower is half-man, half-robot, half-carnivorous ninja pirate, but all poet. With over 30,000 poems written in his lifetime covering topics ranging from circus food to the labor divisions of modern America, Hilton manages to capture the anger of a man torn between his love of laughing gas and his hatred of hot dogs. This page features exclusive poetry written by the man Poem Critic magazine once called "Ginsberg dug up and reanimated with juices from the Devil's refrigerator."
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